Use any of the following in your business correspondence: smiley faces, “LOL,” or “Ha ha.”
- Respond to emails with questions that are answered in the body of the initial email.
- Respond to emails with topics that aren’t relevant to the subject of the email.
- Ignore traditional spelling and grammatical rules.
- Do not proof read emails for clarity; send 1-5 subsequent emails to clear things up.
- When someone brings up an opposing point, continue restating your original point until the other person gives up.
- Use the words deter and defer interchangeably.
- Pronounce “supposedly” as “supposably.” When corrected, laugh hysterically and say, “Whatever!”
- Pronounce “stability” as “stabability.” When corrected, laugh hysterically and say, “Whatever!”
- Insist on “setting a president.”
- Laugh at every single thing you say, whether it is appropriate or not.
- Do not respect other people’s time. Showing up late/missing meetings or letting them run late is perfectly fine.
- Take showers only when your hair has started to clump into oily strands.
- Show up to the office with stains on your clothing.
- Try your hardest to forget all basic math skills.